Z? Boy! Different story. She is becoming a girly girl already, and it’s weird because she started off as a tomboy (she still is - kinda), but these days, she is really observing and doing things I do.

When, I’m fixing my hair, same goes for her. When I apply baby powder on my face, yup, she does. She asked to put on a necklace the other day - because she saw mine.

This weekend, as we were leaving out, I grabbed my sunglasses, she grabbed one out of MY collection (she broke hers), put it on, and strutted away with an attitude.

The list goes on for days!

Well, this morning as we were going to drop them off at school, I grabbed my purse, and why did missy grab a bag too. But guess what? The bag she grabbed was big enough to stuff her in. Literally. Are you all familiar with a blow-up mattress? Well, have you seen the bag that comes with a queen size one? Yes, that’s the bag she grabbed to take to school with her - as a purse. Lol!

Dad tried to take it from her and it was a complete riot. She won’t let go. Eventually, he won. But she didn’t give up without a fight.

We were watching a documentary on Turkey, the country. Our little man turned to us (his parents). “Why is it called turkey?” Before we could respond…he says, “Is it because there are a lot of turkeys there?” *crickets* Seriously, what do you say to that? Both my husband and I were dying on the inside, but just sat straight faced.

My husband managed, “Well, that’s just what it’s named. It’s just the way it is.”

Hahahahahaha…gotta love the kids and their brains! Have a fantastic weekend, lovers!

Now, what got me as I listened to the story on the news (in addition to the disbelief that this child is going through this) is that while Hannah had surgery to remove part of the mass, they told her mother that it was not breast cancer. Why? “Because breast cancer does not happen to children,” they said.

I don’t think these doctors are alone in that belief. I think if we took a poll, majority of us would have thought the same thing. Lesson learned!

It took a series of tests and results that caught the doctors off guard: it turns out that Hannah had Stage IIA Invasive Ductal Carcinoma - supposedly, an adult form of breast cancer. This meant that the tumor would have to be removed, and as a result, Hannah had a mastectomy earlier this year. I can’t help but cry as I write this because my heart goes out to both Hannah and her mom. Equally.

Why? Why? Why? Urrggh!

It’s hard enough for kids to be kids, but to have health related issues on top of being a kid is unjust. Children should never be sick. Children should not have health issues. They are far too innocent to understand and deal. That said, I do believe that when kids are sick, it truly humbles your heart as an adult. They live with it with so much grace, and you never hear them complain.

I did a wee bit of research to find out how common this was, and while it’s not severely common (a handful of cases), it does happen. I read of another story in China where the husband suspected after one of the twins came out really big, weak and sickly. In addition both kids had different blood types. Eventually, the wife confessed to having an affair with her ex-boyfriend. Boy!

So is the story of 20 year old, Mia of Dallas, Texas. She claimed that she was shocked to find out that her twin sons had different dads. Justin and Jordan Washington were born seven minutes apart 11 months ago and doctors have since confirmed that they were fathered by different men. She had their DNA tested after noticing that the boys looked so different from each other. Mia did admit to cheating on her partner, James Harrison with another man.

According to medical experts, chances of twins having different dads are a million to one. However, the test showed that there was only a 0.001 per cent chance that Justin and Jordan have the same father. Apparently, since women release multiple eggs during ovulation, if one has more than one sexual partners in that period, two eggs can be fertilized by separate sperms.

The boys sort of look alike - I don’t think I’ll be able to tell otherwise until they are much older, or if they are standing side by side.

Luckily for Mia, her partner, James, decided to stick around and raise both boys as his. The identity of the other dad has not been disclosed. And check this, Mia is expecting another child again. This time she says “I can guarantee there’ll be no questions raised this time around.” OK, Mia.

Do you think the kids have a right to know? Or at least the unidentified father? I think so. Mia indicated that she won’t reveal the situation to the kids until they are old enough to make decisions on their own. I don’t think I agree with this, but curious to find out what others think.

photo credit: The Sun

I’m sure this is sort of normal for every new mom parent - at least I hope so. To assure us that we are not insane. I’m sure this is a temporary feeling, and it will come to pass. The good Lord will help us.

She is asleep here, and I still made her take a pic with her big bro and sis.

A big thank you to Dr. Jay Goldberg who delivered Ameenah (and Zurhi, too). Thank you to the team at Cedars Sinai Medical Center. What a fantastic hospital and workers.

Now that I got all of my shoutouts out of the way, I’d like to share my exit with you all. It’s nothing sophisticated - lol.

Here is the conversation that took place…

Nurse: “So, congratulations again and see you next time, right?”

Greg & I: Oh, for sure! Absolutely! We’ll be back with #4…hehehe.”

Nurse: “Alright, mom your wheelchair is right outside the door.”

Me: “Wheelchair? I’m rolling outta here in a wheelchair…oh noooooo. I’m OK! Trust me, I’m OK to walk.”

Nurse: “No ma’am. Sorry, it’s the hospital protocol. Don’t your remember from the last time?”

Me: “No!”

Greg: “Don’t worry, honey, the paparazzis are not outside yet.”

Me: “They are not???” Dumbfounded.

Greg: “No hon, we didn’t call them yet.”

Me: “Shoot! Well, you never know. To be safe, I’ll put on my big glasses, hold on to my fancy bag and still go ahead and exit in style.”

Nurse: “Uhm…maam, No. You need to carry the baby on your lap.”

Me: “I do? Shoot! So, who carries my bag?”

Aunt Em: “I will take it.”

All of this drama to find out that we were parked in a gated, roofed, secured, valet parking lot, and didn’t run into a soul. Not even patients or visitors. Lol. No one noticed us. We exited quietly, and with no hassle. If you haven’t noticed, I’m a drama queen!

Stay fab, lovelies.

So, as stated in a previous post, I’m not ignoring any of your thoughtful direct msgs/concerns/comments on the blog. You know I always respond. I really appreciate you - I feel like we are all family at this point. We are a community that continues to grow. I will update you all here as much as I can.

As always, keep checking back. Everyday! And you never know, I may surprise you with something…like maybe some pictures of our new addition this week. *smiles*

PS- Don’t forget to keep checking us out over at our lifestyle blog, Style Pantry -  it’s not just me working over there. It will be updated regularly with fun stuff. Lots of pictures too. Enjoy and get involved.

Much love to you all.

Folks, do I need to remind us that it costs absolutely nothing to be kind and everything if you aren’t? Let’s think of others this week. What can you do to help someone other than yourself or family?

You don’t have to show off what you can do. We should live for the good of others, and not ourselves. Self centeredness is the root of every strife. The generation behind us is following us with stride, so let’s lead by example. Your kids are watching and learning from you, so set the record straight.

Kill with an act of kindness. When you are at a drive-thru, pay for the car behind you. Get the door for the mother struggling with her stroller. Settle a mis-communication with a friend. Buy lunch for the homeless guy you see on the corner every day. Something so minute to you, can be grand for someone else.

Visit a patient at your local hospital and read to them, or bring them flowers. Bake cookies for your neighbors, say a prayer for a friend. Do a random act, and see how amazing it makes the person on the receiving end feel. Spread the love and make the world a better place.

Feel free to tell us about what/how someone has been to kind to you. Or like a dear friend would say, “share your bright moments.” Let’s keep the circle of love going.

The last thing I want to do is judge anyone for making certain decisions due to circumstances they find themselves in.

That being said, here are my thoughts. Having a baby with your partner is NOT a reason to get married. I feel for the poor innocent baby. Such pressure on him/her. Whatever happened to love, eh? Love and mutual respect for one another are substantial reasons to get married. There may be a couple of factors in there that may make it OK. For instance, you’ve been a couple for quite sometime or you are currently engaged. Love should be the foundation of producing babies, no? Otherwise, the child is going to end up suffering for this.

If you love each other first, and marriage was discussed prior to, sure, you might as well go ahead and seal the deal. But I don’t think you should make it about the baby/pregnancy. That’s a lot of pressure put on everyone involved. Did I already say that? Oh, thought I should reiterate. Bringing a baby into this world is a joyous moment, at the same token, it does places a strain on some relationships. Financially and emotionally, so if you don’t have a solid relationship to withhold the strains, it could cause havoc, and possibly show you that you married for the wrong reasons.

I actually think this should be the other way around. Marriage should be a reason to get pregnant. Start a family.

Now, I agree that not everyone has to adhere to the traditional views of society. Being legally married on paper does not guarantee the success of any relationship. You can choose to do things your way, have kids and not get married at all. As a matter of fact, I have seen those kind of relationships last longer that traditional ones.

It’s OK to stay together if you found out that you’re pregnant, have the baby, wait to see how things go (while you two are raising the child together), and decide if the love is still there and enough to hold a marriage. Ask yourself this. Would you have gotten married if you weren’t pregnant? Did you see yourself spending the rest of your life with this person?

You know one thing I learned early on in relationships? It may sound corny, but I have always done this and it usually works for me, so it doesn’t hurt to give it a shot. On a piece of paper, write down 10 things you DON’T like about this person: 10 nuances/flaws/dislikes/habits. When you’re done, go through the list with the notion that this person you are about to marry will never change these things about themselves (afterall, you can’t change a person, right?) put a check mark next to things you can deal with, and x mark next to the ones you can’t see yourself dealing with. If the check mark out numbers the x, there’s your decision, and vice versa.

This is my own little 2 cents. Hope it helps.

Well, the madness didn’t stop there. A lot of moms actually took it personal and apparently kept sending tweets to express their anger. Can folks seriously relax?

“@JoelMadden as a mother, thats pretty uncool. if she does it to another kid, or if another kid does it to her and makes her bleed…”

“@JoelMadden how you gonna feel?”

“@J0di well jodi, teach your kid to bite and then we will have to see….”

“@JoelMadden my daughter is 20, lets go…. first one to bitch loses.”

Joel finally left it at this:

“For all the moms who r givin me shit about the harlow biting thing, i hope she bites your kid at school. RELAX.”

Then @j0di now claimed that she was joking with this response..

“@JoelMadden I wasn’t being a bitch about it, hope u know I was half joking, but us moms have been thru it before, its a pain to deal with”

I personally thought it was funny. Joel’s jokes are somewhat witty on twitter, and when you are limited to 140 characters to update your status, you kinda have to be creative, or write in codes. So, I’m sure there was more to the whole teaching Harlow how to bite incident, but he couldn’t go into details.

And even if that isn’t the case, who’s business is it? It’s his daughter, it’s his girl, why are people getting upset? I’m confused. It’s all in good fun and I just wish that people will stop taking themselves too seriously. It seems like everyone feels the need to speak up these days and let their voice be heard.

What do you moms and dads think? Is Joel in the wrong? Is there a need for him to be crucified here?

I was trying to have a convo with Greg this morning. I had just one thing to say, and my poor hubby had to stand there for half an hour just for me to complete my sentence. Why? I was catching my breath after each word.

Seriously, times like this, I wish everything was close by in the house. I wish all the rooms in the house were close together. You know, like a step away. Lol. Now I know what penguins go through, I see why it takes them eons to get from point A to B, as I feel like a tuxedo’d wobbler myself right now.

Doc Hollywood (errr, 90212), has placed me on “strict” bed rest. For me, that’s like being in solitary confinement. I’m usually on the “go.” From morning till crash time. Even when I’m asleep, my brain is still running on overdrive. So, you can imagine how hard this is for me. But like the title of the post reads. It’s any day now. It’s all a waiting game at this point and she can decide to come right after I finish writing this post.

If I’m MIA, you know why, right? I certainly don’t want to leave you all hanging - especially since I have been receiving lovely msgs from some of you asking after me, to see if baby #3 is finally here, etc. (Thank you for the well wishes and thoughts, my friends. They’re greatly appreciated.)

Posting may slow down a bit. I try to post every other day. Actually, I post everyday because I run two blogs. This and Style Pantry. So, when I’m not writing on here, I’m writing on SP - in addition to managing the WeWe Store. Bear with me, OK? Just for a few weeks. I will keep updating and writing as often as I can until things get back to normal.

By the way, let me take this opportunity to reiterate to the moms (you don’t have to be a mom to join) that we are going to lose the baby weight together. I will be sharing my daily diet/meal and exercise regimen, so stay tuned.

But first, I’m praying for a safe and healthy delivery and baby. Keep me in your prayers. I have been truly blessed. Thanks to you all.

Yesterday, we sat around with the kiddies talking about Easter and the importance. Here’s G trying to explain in a nutshell, and as simply as possible.

G turned to S (our son), “by the way, do you understand/know the story of Easter?”

S: Sorta. Uhm, I don’t know. I don’t think I’ve ever heard it.

Me: Thinking to myself. Wow, so he has not being paying attention at Sunday school?!?!?!

G: OK! Let me explain. So, you know that Jesus was killed on the cross, right?

S: Yes! That’s really sad.

G: Well, so when they brought him down, they put him in a tomb and covered it with a huge rock. But a few days later, he rose from the dead and shocked the world…..(the story went on a few more sentences).

S’s eyes lit, his face, super expressive. In total shock..as if hearing the story for the first time. It could be the first time he actually paid attention and understood the story..

S: WOW! That means Jesus is totally like…immortal, right?

Me: uhhh, like…sure, dude. Rock on! Lol

Happy Easter, Folks! Stay blessed.

Dear Folake,

I just got back from Ethiopia a few days ago visiting several of the wells we built. This was by far one of the most impactful trips I have ever taken, and I wanted to share a story with you.

As our truck made it across the mountainous terrain towards the village of “Mai Gundi”, we heard a quiet rumble in the background. As we looked back, we were surprised to see what looked like 500 villagers stampeding down the hill towards us. Like something out of Braveheart. As they got closer we realized it was children of all ages who have been waiting for weeks for us to arrive.  Many of them with hand made signs that they were holding in the air as if they were cheering for their favorite sports team. But these signs were different. Some professing, “Water is Life” others saying “To educate a woman is to educate a society”. While another simply stated what was most important to him, “Water”. Over 100 men and women, along with these 500 children from the local school celebrated, danced, and played musical instruments as they led us down the mountain to the water well. It is tradition or the elders of the village to give a speech to and welcome their guests. I will never forget what one 75 year old woman said to us.

“For all my life, I have walked for hours every day bringing home water for my family. Most of the time this water was not clean. I have seen my children and grandchildren get sick and die because of bad water.  I have had to walk with a 40 lb clay jar on my back through rough terrain up and down mountains, which has caused my back to hunch over, but I had no other choice.”  We could tell the sincerity in her voice as she went on to say: “You have lifted the weight off of my back and you have given our children a future. I was not educated but now our kids have that chance.”

After her speech the translator told me that he had a hard time translating what she was saying and he couldn’t find the words to depict exactly how sincere and grateful she was. I promised to share her story with the people who helped give them water.

If you want to hear more updates and stay in touch with Generosity Water you can follow me on Twitter. @JordanDWagner and encourage your friends to do the same.

Please also help by joining our cause on Facebook by clicking the link below.

Generosity Water - Facebook Cause

It is so amazing that the people of Mai Gundi haven’t had clean water for their entire lives but for only $4000 and 4 weeks later these 500 people can celebrate life in a whole new way.

Thank you for your continued support of Generosity Water. Your help is truly changing lives all over the world.  This story would not be possible without you.

Best Regards,
Jordan

Her dad bought her a sign book when she was much younger, and after she turned a year, big brother was so excited and eager to teach her to converse with us in sign language.

This little girl has it down packed. It’s so cute, but I get confused…lol.

She says please, thank you, I love you, food/eat, more, milk, and the list goes on. What confuses me, however, is the food/eat/more. She gets up early in the morning and does a sign for “more” and I’m like “More? Of what? Sleep? You want to go back to sleep?” Please be my guest.

But she is actually asking for food.

When she is hungry, she signs for “more” before she signs for “food” or “eat” which I think is cute…depending on the circumstance Like I mentioned above, waking up from sleep and signing “more” only tells me that you want more sleep (I know better now, of course - at least, so I thought).

This morning, I was massaging the back of her knees. She signed for more, so I went to get her food. She refused to eat. Now, I’m really confused. She kept signing, and I kept handing her food. We were back and forth for like 5mins. Then it occurred to me that she was probably enjoying the massage. Duhhhhh!

I put her back in bed and continued massaging. Boy, you should have seen the huge smile on her face and the sense of satisfaction. She was almost falling asleep.

And then as soon as I was done, of course, she got up and signed for “food.” I thought that was “more”?? Are you all confused now? Join the club….lol.

I was fuming, smoke oozing out of my ears. I turned red, and since I have really dark skin it’s pretty amazing that you could see the red in my face. I was not ready for what I saw, so I fumbled. Here is the conversation between Z and I. Keep in mind, she is 19 months old.

Me: “Holly Smokes, Z what are you doing?” Her dress is wet, her hands are drenched in toilet water, and she has toilet water all over her face.

Z: In her soft baby voice…speaking in Spanglish. “But I wan agua.”

And here I am trying to decide if I should respond in English, Spanish or Yoruba. So I mixed them all up.

Me: “No no no no! No toilet agua for you..drink! Ki lo de.” (Ki lo de = Why?)

Z: She gave me the confused look. Like WTF was that? Because right now, you are bad at all three languages.

G: Laughing uncontrollably in the background, shaking his head and wondering what happened to my brain and speech.

Man! I picked her up, washed her and santized her hands. I can’t santize her mouth now…can I?

Have a fab friday and enjoy your weekend!

How many of you have actually thought, on the first date, “I am going to spend the rest of my life with him/her”, it came to pass, and you’re still together?

Those first dates can be magical, huh? You never notice the time or your surroundings. You are so involved in one another that you get sad at the idea of parting - when it’s time to.

There are definitely instances where marriages stemmed from first dates, but what are the success rates? I am having a very curious mind this afternoon, so do chime in, readers.

You know, when your spouse portrays little annoyances here and there - that potentially lead to “big deals.” Do you call it quits with him/her?

Are these annoyances really worth the headache and stress of going through a divorce? I personally don’t know. I have always thought that “grounds for divorce” should come in form of infidelity, any kind of abuse,  betrayal, falling out of love, lack of respect..you know, the big things. Supposedly. However, those little things, to me, are foundation for the bigger things written above to take place. But what do I know, eh?

Those little quirks should be worked out it before they become grand.

I think most enter into a marriage with expectations. Usually, the men expect that women are caretakers and the duties of the house belongs to them. While some women go in with the notion that men are the money makers and shakers. They make things happen. Make sure the bills get paid, etc.

In my opinion, these are primitive expectations and thoughts. This sort of conversation is such that should come up before getting married. When you two are courting. Topics like chores, finances, health, etc. should be laid out on the table so you don’t get any surprises once you tie the knot.

We need to communicate our thoughts and expectations openly and clearly. Be true to yourself.

I don’t think anyone wants to come home every single day to a lazy partner. It can be irritating. Even more so when you confront them, and they make nothing but lame excuses. One of my readers (who prompted this post), complained of her husband, who recently got laid off. She gets home everyday to find him playing xbox. He played it before he lost his job too. The only time he gets up from playing is when he needs to use the bathroom or grab something to eat. Now, is that grounds for divorce? Well, maybe not…if they can iron it out. These kinds of behavior surely puts a damper on relationships.

Before bringing up the “D” word, though, I think it’s imperative to talk it out with your spouse. Sit him/her down and have a heart to heart conversation. Let them know the severity of this dispute. If your partner truly cares, and wants to make a difference or salvage the relationship, you’ll see it and things will change. Doing chores around the house is not meant for one - not unless you’re paying someone to take care of these responsibilities. Your spouse may have come from a background where him/her have never had to lift a finger. They had everything done for them. So, it may take you actually training and talking over and over again for them to finally get it. To the point where they no longer need reminders and take initiative.

I want to hear your experiences, though. How has this worked (or not) for you?

]]> http://blog.weweclothing.com/2009/03/27/is-a-lazy-spouse-grounds-for-divorce/feed/ http://blog.weweclothing.com/2009/03/25/jon-kate-plus-8-follow-up/ http://blog.weweclothing.com/2009/03/25/jon-kate-plus-8-follow-up/#comments Wed, 25 Mar 2009 13:31:14 +0000 Folake Kuye Huntoon http://blog.weweclothing.com/?p=173 05/08/09 UPDATE: According to Us Weekly, Jon is infact having an affair!

“In the new issue of Us Weekly (on newsstands Wednesday), five people close to the situation - including two relatives of the other woman - confirm that Jon & Kate Plus 8 dad Jon Gosselin, 32, has been having an affair with third grade school teacher Deanna Hummel.

The most explosive blow-by-blow details are revealed by Deanna’s older brother - and roommate - Jason, who tells Us Weekly that he is speaking out now to set the record straight and to protect his naive sister.”

“At the Hummel house, Jason says Deanna and Jon would “pretty much stay locked away like two teenagers. It was weird. He’s a grown man. He also adds, “A lot of the time, it was pretty, um, gross listening to her, you know, um — how do I say this? The walls are thin. Let’s just say that. I mean, no one wants to hear his sister having sex, let alone with a married dude who’s, like, almost twice her age and who has eight kids and a maybe-crazy wife. Ick. Nast.”

03/25/09 FOLLOW UP UPDATE:

If you watched the season finale of “Jon & Kate Plus 8,” you’d notice that it still leaves viewers wondering about the infidelity rumors. Granted, it addressed the fact that they are having problems, and Jon having issues about being in the spotlight *blank stare.* This is coming a little too late…don’t ya think? The show is going on its 5th season. Which means he has been in the spotlight for the last 4years.

After they’ve banked dollars, gained exposure, and received numerous gifts, he is now having a problem with the spotlight? Please!

They admitted to being in an “odd place” right now in their union, but what does that mean? This statement only fuels the infidelity rumors. It does not eradicate it. It is obvious that they are having marital problems, which is truly sad. I can’t begin to fathom what life would be like for Kate if he leaves her with 8 kids. And 6 of them are toddlers…

Makes me wonder why Jon went to stay at his mother’s house in one of the episodes. He was gone for a while and Kate was left to cater for the kids herself. They did say he went to assist his mom, who broke her foot, but come on? Who leaves his wife and 8 kids for that long to cater to his mom that is only suffering from a broken foot? Sorry, mother.

Something tells me it has to do with my previous post.

Jon had this to say at the end of the interview, “I’m glad the show is popular, but it’s hard being on this side of the camera - and then trying to live your life. We don’t have privacy at all. When I go out, people photograph me. It’s tough for me. I can’t just be Jon; I have to be ‘Jon & Kate Plus 8,’ which is a really hard thing for me. I’m still coming to grips with that.”

Sigh! Life must be so rough, Jon. The fame is so intruding that the solution to that is sticking your tongue down a college girl’s throat, eh? Got it! Like I said before, I like Jon, loved him on the show. But no excuses for infidelity. Especially not the lame excuses about fame.

I really wish them well and hope that they can some how resolve this amicably. It doesn’t look like they are on the same page as far as the fame and fortune. Kate is enjoying it, including the perks, but Jon? Not so much..supposedly. Why did you sign up for it then? Or better yet, why not terminate the contract?

As Jon left it…”And there’s the conflict.” Kate is “very happy,” he is not.

I wish them the best!

I am in love. With my sister. I know, I know, I’m such a hypocrite. Last week, I wrote a post about incestuous relationships and how sick it is. And here I am lusting over my sister. Lol.

I can’t help it. She is mega beautiful inside and out. Everyone, and I mean everyone loves my sister. Even her haters, though, they have a unique way of showing it. Lol.

You are truly sensational. Thanks for being such a fantastic role-model and for stepping in to raise me as your child, albeit, you are actually not old enough to have me (we are 3.5 years apart). In fact, most think I am older. I think it’s those cute dimples and innocent smile of yours that trick people into thinking that. And I don’t blame them.

Enjoy your day today. Sorry I can’t be there with you. We had a fantastic time last year, though, didn’t we? Keep looking and feeling young as you continue to age gracefully.

Folks, please join me in wishing her a Happy Birthday. Feel free to tap her also (if you see her in person) and give her a hug and a kiss for me. Tell her it’s from her sister, but make sure you don’t have BO and bad breath going on. She is sort of allergic - Lol. Just kidding!

Fabulous one, have a superb birthday! Love you loads, baby. You totally ROCK!

In the news yesterday, there was yet another report of a mother in Houston abandoning her new born baby girl in a clothes dryer. And check this, the umbilical cord was still attached!!!!!

How insane, ruthless, heartless and mean?  Didn’t these women carry there babies for 9months and developed some sort of bond? I’m seriously trying to understand their chain of thought, but I’m not getting it.

I’m sure there are some underlying factors, but it still doesn’t add up. Sorry!

Can you imagine telling these babies when they get older? That they were found in a clothes dryer and their mothers placed them there? That will trouble them for the rest of their lives.

Let’s get it together people, can we?

Alas, try to have a good weekend, folks!